So question... what do I need to do to make you proud of me? Become an IT Manager, and become a Godly man just like you are? Do I need to go and become a '' children's pastor'' at two different churches? Do I need to have two kids and show more love to one? Do I need to tell my kid, '' I am not going to your baptism because you are only doing it for attention."? Do I just need to kill myself, because it seems like your life would be heaven if I were gone... oh wait do you still believe in God?
It always seems to you that everything I do in my life is to get attention. Well it isn't true. if it were true, I may have joined the marines just because you did. maybe I would have stayed home and helped mommy cleaned the house. Maybe i would be the perfect little angel you always wanted me to be. Get all A's, be skinny, be active, move out, listen to you ALL THE TIME. Well sorry... wait... I am not sorry for not being what you want me to be.
I want to work for Invisible Children, work for World Vision, work for TOMS, work for Falling Whistles, go to Uganda, go to Swaziland, go to Kenya, or go to some third world country. It's not because I like the organization, it is because God has called me to do that.
Sorry to disappoint you dad, that I am not going to live in some nice apartment while working 60+ hours a week cooking food. Sorry for disappointing Grandma. I can not face her at the wedding, I won't be going. I can't face anyone.
I feel like Jared before he bumped into David. Alone, in need, in want of a family... a loving family... a loving father.
If you are reading this. I don't want you to change unless you want to change.
You are constantly telling me to get my priorities straight, and I tell you that I do. I do have them straight. God, God's purpose, friends, family, school, work. And, yes, I believe that school and work go that low on my priorities list. And, yes, Invisible Children would fall under God's Purpose. I feel God calling me to this amazing Organization, whether you believe me or not is your choice.
I am just frustrated that I tell you that "by the way, 5 people found the lord this week." All you can say is, " Yeah I read that on Facebook." not even a '' Wow that's amazing, Praise God'' or '' I am PROUD of you for going outside your comfort zone.''
I bet you don't even know what my comfort zone is. I bet you don't even know what I believe God wants me to do in Third World Countries.
It's nice to know that I have at least one father, who really loves me and cares about what I do or think.
Forgotten Daugther,
Laura
